Get Yourself an Accountability Partner.
I’m not big on New Year’s Resolutions. But I’m a firm believer in evaluating where you are and where you want to go. So, at the start of every year I take stock and decide my path for the coming year.
I create a list every year called my “Do – Be – Have” list. I pull out the list from the previous year and evaluate how I’ve done, take a piece of paper, fold it three ways, and create a new list for each of the three words.
Last year’s ‘Have’ list included a mentor. My critical voice looked at it and thought…..oh well, you didn’t get that done this past year.
But I stopped short of putting it on my 2019 list. Is a mentor really what I need? I know what I want, and I know what to do to get it. The reality is I fall short of ‘doing’ for a whole slew of various reasons.
It’s accountability that I need and not a mentor.
And as luck would have it…..I already have an accountability partner. Kim and I have taken some of the same online courses so we speak the same language, if you will.
She’s a photographer and is an amazing business woman. Kim lives in Houston and I live in Minneapolis. We’ve only met a few times, but we connected over encaustic and bonded over our love of creative business ventures.
We’ve talked once a week for the last 3 years or so about growing our online businesses, but recently the discussions have morphed into more about creativity and what we’re saying with our imagery.
Slowly, but surely, our conversations are changing. But what remains the same is our accountability to each other.
I know I get more done when I tell Kim I am going to finish xyz by next week. It’s sorta like being motivated to go to the gym when you’re meeting someone there to workout with. Being accountable to someone is a great motivator.
We are social animals, and feel guilty if we don’t keep our promises, especially if we’re connected to the person we made the promise to.
It was only in thinking about this blog post that I realized why I didn’t put ‘having a mentor’ on that list. A mentorship is more hierarchical than a peer to peer accountability partner. Mentorships are for guidance and are usually with people who are well ‘networked’. Accountability partners are for making progress towards goals.
And accountability partners are much easier to find. It works best when it’s two colleagues/artists/friends (your accountability partner doesn’t have to do what you do) who like and respect each other. It’s imperative you feel connected to each other as it will help keep you honest and moving on the path you set for yourself.
Although accountability means answering or accounting for your actions and results, this isn’t the same as an accountability app on your phone reminding you what you need to do. Your success is about building a mutual reciprocal relationship. I think we all know that if someone devotes their time and commits to helping us succeed, it’s not only right that you help them succeed, but that you honor the relationship and achieve the goals you committed to yourself.
When you commit to someone that you will do it, it stretches your probability to 65%. Moreover, when you create a specific accountability appointment with a person you are committed to, the odds are in your favor: 95%. – Gustavo Razzetti
Most people set broad and open-ended goals. Having an accountability partner forces you to break down your goals into steps that you commit to complete week by week, therefore getting you closer to your desire.
Selecting your accountability partner requires a thoughtful, strategic approach.
- Find someone you trust to be your accountability partner. Think about if you have the same values, can be available when you are available, communicate in a way that is similar to you, isn’t afraid to call out your B.S., and has your best interests at heart.
- Make it a priority. Respect your commitment
- Talk about your goals. Know what you need. Accountability should be tied to specific outcomes.
- Get specific with them about actions you will want to take to meet your goals as well as consequences/rewards for taking or not taking them.
- Meet every week or every two weeks. Set up regular live check-in times. The “I’ll call you when I need you” approach doesn’t work. You need to build rhythm and consistency.
- Test the relationship. Before you decide on a long-time commitment, experiment with it for a couple of weeks.
- Revisit goals and strategies every 3 months or so, reflect on your progress and determine what needs to be changed, if anything.
But most importantly you get to decide how structured or unstructured you want this to be. There is no right or wrong here. Find a partner that will help you move forward with whatever it is you want to do.
Would love to hear what your experience has been with accountability partners. Let me know in the comments below.
Be well….be creative,
Thanks for this great article, Clare! The specifics about what you and your accountability partner do is especially helpful–something that is left out of too many articles on this topic. I have a three quasi-accountability partners in that we do share our goals/dreams and what we are working on, bounce around ideas, and stay in touch, but it’s not structured. In all cases, we’ve talked about making it more structured, so perhaps I will move forward with that. All the best for the new year!
Hi Lee Anne….yes, get more structure to it. These types of groups are invaluable when it comes to moving forward. It’s funny, I’ve been thinking about a mentor for years…..and as it turns out….all I really need is something that I’ve already got. With a little more structure…..imagine how useful this group will be to all of you! Good luck and keep me posted.
Awesome article! Thanks so much for sharing.
You are very welcome Linda. So glad you liked it.
Thank you. I’ve thought about this for years and realize I have an ideal accountability partner in my sister who is also an artist, and yet we don’t have this structure in place and that missing piece is probably more important than I realized. Am going to contact her today about adding some structure to our accountability. To make it work better.
This is perfect Nancy. Yes…..the structure helps move things along consistently!
Really like these specific tips on this subject! I will be on the lookout for an accountability partner now with all of this in mind. Thanks!
That is awesome Sara. It’s really a game changer!
“1. Find someone you trust to be your accountability partner. Think about if you have the same values, can be available when you are available, communicate in a way that is similar to you, isn’t afraid to call out your B.S., and has your best interests at heart.”
Wow, this just sums it all up for me. It’s number 1 for a reason, and if the trust and willingness is there for both of you, the partnership will be solid – even if it eventually takes a different shape, or if you have conflict, or it (someday) dissolves. It’s the foundation of all that follows.
And I think that’s what’s missing with all these “Mastermind” offerings and Mentorship offerings: I’m quite sure these people are great – but the trust isn’t there to begin with; as a prerequisite. You’re literally walking into a group of strangers – and every one of the Masterminds that I’ve done in my earlier years didn’t last long, because the *trust wasn’t in place first.* It’s like trying to build a house – without first laying a foundation.
Anyway, I do have someone like this to confide in – and even though she lives many states away, we have implicit trust. We try to talk every week, and we review our projects and businesses, and also personal stuff, too. We’ve had (rare) conflicts, and when we do, we know the strength of our mutual trust can bear the weight of it. It takes work, and devotion, to sustain such a rich relationship. And it’s totally worth it.
You are absolutely right Gail. I’ve tried the mastermind thing too and it’s always fallen a little short. So glad you have someone to confide in!
Thank you Clare that was a wonderful arrival and very helpful for me. Makes me think about who I can trust and respect and vica verca for my partener. All food for thought. Have an amazing 2019
Aileen
Thanks Aileen. Hoping your year is amazing as well.
Perfect article for the start of the new year thank you so much Clare for sharing it. Now I will also share it with my studio mates it will definitely help us stay focused. Happy new year from Carmel California
So glad it will be a benefit to you and your studio mates Koko! Happy New Year to you as well.
I am printing this and going in search of an accountability partner today!
Awesome article, thank you👍
Love to hear this! Good luck on your search. I tried a couple of people before I found the one that stuck. So don’t get discouraged. You have to go down certain paths to see if they are right. Once you feel it’s not working, get out fast and find another.